vanessaurbinajournalism

Journalism in U.S.A

See What I See and Feel How I Feel.

with one comment

Honey, honey, honey babe y ya dejemos de llorar! “Hurry, because thoughts, reasoning and wisdom sometimes just come for a second, or a minute, or maybe 20 minutes of enlightenment,” I said to myself.

An artist -that is who I want to be, to live my life, to take risks, to believe I am capable of doing anything. Frida‘s book in front of me is my inspiration, just as it is that crazy man Dalí, or my favorite and lovely poet Mario Benedetti.

Frida and the Globe

Everything is now getting together, making sense. Suddenly life starts to have a meaning, and you have started to become more aware of those details you used to ignore even when knowing there was a message hidden on them, but you were not ready to connect the dots. But now, yes now!  He or she are not the ones saying it, it is you; you are the writer of your life. Now it is time to throw yourself to anarchy …  I mean life. Life without poetry, without music, without feelings, or good food, would that be life? With no mistakes, or learnings, no coincidences?

Life is like a soccer ball or a basketball ball, in which the ball is being attacked, and touched and sometimes finds itself flying and it falls and bounces, but at the end the ball will always find its goal, its point-its final destination.

Or life can also be seen as a dance. A dance in which at the beginning you are just learning the basics steps but with time and practice you start feeling more comfortable and self-confident and later: ta-ra! … Magic comes to life … you start feeling the music in your body and without being able to contain it a smile shows up, and you feel your body is too little to embark everything you are feeling in that exact moment, that words are not enough; and that is part of being alive, to be able to touch the sky with your eyes open. I see dance as a metaphor for life because I am a dancer. Yes I am an artist and I love being one. I also love analyzing and finding beauty on the sounds and the meaning of the words when they come together even in exquisite corpse or in form of a poem or a short story; and when those words stay forever in me, filling my memory with beautiful quotes.

… trying to remember what i thought exactly 20 minutes ago …

I remember! I was looking at the globe in front of me and it reminded me of Quino and his Mafalda.

Mafalda. Quino.

… To wait, to wait. Sometimes is not that good idea to wait, but you just know it when you follow your intuition and listen to your heart. Do not judge others, because you could be in their position at any time. Montreal … the canoe my sister made in wood for my dad; and the horse and the “guerrillero” from Chiapas, Mexico. En tu sonrisa yo veo una guerrilla, una aventura, un movimiento! This “guerrillero” and the horse might mean for a child a simple toy, but for others it might mean an idea, a movement, a libertarian army: The Zapatista Army of National Liberation (Ejército Zapatista de Liberación Nacional, EZLN) And who is to say what is wrong and what is right?

Guerrillero y Caballo

Each of us have a process, have our own fears, anxieties… and talking about anxieties: Ansiedad, maldita ansiedad. I’m not so sure anymore if anxiety makes me any better. Actually, I think it does not allow me to think clearly and makes me do ridiculous things.

1st minute: Inhale, exhale. I feel good, I feel I can be like this all time, but can I really? At least I can try.

… last minutes: I had a vision! A beautiful large and black woman telling me I had to see myself when imagining  the things I wanted to do, that each time I imagined something I wanted to be or do, I will have to change the unknown face and visualize mine. That black and large women: My goddess!

Written by vurbi

May 25, 2011 at 00:46

Posted in Uncategorized

One Response

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  1. Mi ninha linda! Tienes mi pleno apoyo en todo…Explota ese potencial que llevas adentro!

    Mauricio

    May 25, 2011 at 16:17


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